Proposed State Mottos
- Alabama:
- Yes, we have electricity
- Alaska:
- We also take American money
- Arizona:
- But It's a Dry Heat
- Arkansas:
- Litterasy Ain't Everthing
- California:
- As Seen on TV
- Colorado:
- If You Don't Ski, Don't Bother
- Connecticut:
- Like Massachusetts, Only Dirtier and With Less Character
- Delaware:
- We Really Do Like the Chemicals in our Water
- Florida:
- Ask Us About Our Grandkids
- Georgia:
- We Put the "Fun" in Fundamentalist Extremism
- Hawaii:
- Haka Tiki Mou Sha'ami Leeki Toru
(Death to Mainland Scum, But Leave Your Money)
- Idaho:
- Potatoes and Neo Nazi's ... What More Could You Ask For?
- Illinois:
- Please Don't Pronounce the "S"
- Indiana:
- 2 Billion Years Tidal Wave Free
- Iowa:
- We Do Amazing Things With Corn
- Kansas:
- Where Science Don't Mean Shit
- Kentucky:
- Five Million People; Fifteen Last Names
- Louisiana:
- We're Not All Drunk Cajun Wackos, But That's Our Tourism Campaign
- Maine:
- We're Really Cold, But We Have Cheap Lobster
- Maryland:
- A Thinking Man's Delaware
- Massachusetts:
- Our Taxes Are Lower Than Sweden's (For Most Tax Brackets)
- Michigan:
- First Line of Defense From the Canadians
- Minnesota:
- 10,000 Lakes and 10,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000 Mosquitoes
- Mississippi:
- Come Feel Better About Your Own State
- Missouri:
- Your Federal Flood Relief Tax Dollars at Work
- Montana:
- 1. Land of the Big Sky, the Unabomber, Right-Wing Crazies, and Very Little Else
2. At Least Our Cows Are Sane
- Nebraska:
- Ask About Our State Motto Contest
- Nevada:
- Whores and Poker!
- New Hampshire:
- Go Away and Leave Us Alone
- New Jersey:
- You Want a F*ckin' Motto? I Got Yer F*ckin' Motto Right Here!
- New Mexico:
- Lizards Make Excellent Pets
- New York:
- You Have the Right to Remain Silent, You Have the Right to an Attorney...
- North Carolina:
- Tobacco is a Vegetable
- North Dakota:
- We Really are One of the 50 States!
- Ohio:
- At Least We're Not Michigan
- Oklahoma:
- Like the Play, only No Singing
- Oregon:
- Spotted Owl... It's What's For Dinner
- Pennsylvania:
- Cook With Coal
- Rhode Island:
- We're Not REALLY An Island
- South Carolina:
- Remember the Civil War? We Didn't Actually Surrender
- South Dakota:
- Closer Than North Dakota
- Tennessee:
- The Educashun State
- Texas:
- Si' Hablo Ing'les (Yes, I speak English)
- Utah:
- Our Jesus Is Better Than Your Jesus
- Vermont:
- Yep
- Virginia:
- Who Says Government Stiffs and Slackjaw Yokels Don't Mix?
- Washington:
- Help! We're Being Overrun By Nerds and Slackers!
- Washington, D.C.:
- Hey, Wanna Be Mayor?
- West Virginia:
- One Big Happy Family - No, really!
- Wisconsin:
- 1. Come Cut Our Cheese
2. Eat Cheese Or Die
- Wyoming:
- Where men are men and sheep are scared